Anonymous asked:

please describe what it is like to live in the us??

iguanamouth:

every morning my alarm gun wakes me up by firing directly over my head and if i dont immediately get up and sing the star spangled banner i get arrested. all matters in court are settled with opponents dressing up in bald eagle costumes and fighting to the death. theres an american flag tattooed across my face. once i saw someone get punched in the head repeatedly at a barbeque because they said they didnt like apple pie and nobody helped them. nobody even tried

the-fandoms-are-cool:

the-fandoms-are-cool:

leradny:

videohall:

Astronaut readjusts to life back on Earth

> Don’t give him a baby for a while.

HE GRABS THE CUP BUT THEN HE DROPS THE PEN 0.0003 SECONDS LATER

AND HE LOOKS UP AT THE CEILING INSTEAD OF AT THE GROUND WHEN HE CAN’T FIND THEM

I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING HE JUST DROPS IT

IT’S NOT FUNNY IT’S VERY LOGICAL THAT HE WOULD HAVE ADJUSTED TO LIVING LIFE WHILE HE WAS IN SPACE BECAUSE IT’S DIFFERENT FROM EARTH BUT I CAN’T FUCKING BREATHE

*THUNK*

YES IT’S BACK ON MY DASH THIS IS MY FAVORITE VIDEO

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